Windows vs. Ford.
OK, I know it’s been a long time since this COMDEX and COMDEX has been replaced by CES, but since some times some things don’t change very quickly and there are just some things in history that you never forget. Enjoy a good chuckle.
For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo (COMDEX) : Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, “If Ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.”
In response to Bill’s comments,
Ford issued a press release stating:
If Ford had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):
1…. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash………twice a day.
2…. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3…. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4…. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5…. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive – but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6…. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single “This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation” warning light.
7…. The airbag system would ask,”Are you sure?”before deploying.
8…. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9…. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10…. You’d have to press the “Start” button to turn the engine off.
11…. Periodically we will automagically download a new program so that things on your dashboard will be in new places we didn’t tell you about. Unless you find a setting we don’t tell you about, this will usually happen when you are going over 50 MPH. (not part of original – suggested by a learned reader )
PS – I’d like to add that when all else fails, you could call “customer service” in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign language how to fix your car yourself!
I’m Don Rima and that’s how are From Where I Stand…
